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Giving Up On God….

Dear Mr. God,

It is time we had a chat.  I have spoken to you on bended knee and with head bowed.  I have called upon you late in the midnight hour.  I have sung your praises.  I have known that You are God, even when I am not being “still.”  When life gave me lemons, I made lemonade and held true to my belief and faith in you.  I have upheld the major commandments and immediately asked forgiveness after realizing that you really don’t have a last name.   I paid tithes – when I could – and when I couldn’t pay tithes, I did so by tithing my time.  I have turned the other cheek so many times I am dizzy and the means by which I have been “treated by my neighbor” certainly doesn’t reflect the way in which I treat myself.  Most likely the closest I will ever get to the “Rapture” is listening to the song that was written in the 80’s by Blondie, but still and yet, my faith has remained steadfast and true.  I gotta tell you Big G – hope you don’t mind the nick name – but my faith is wearing thin.

You have stated time and time again that the “wicked shall prosper for a season” but the “meek shall inherit  the earth.” How long is the season and when will this “inheritance” take effect?  Have you taken a good look at the world you created?

Here is a special litte poem that I wrote just for you….consider it my take on the 23rd Psalm

Myself and others, I have led, and of this I now know, there are times in everyone’s life, when we are meant to follow.

No house have I to dwell in, no place to lay my head, my days are filled with worry, my nights are filled with dread.

In the presence of myself, when there is only me, I understand that there are times, when I am my own worst enemy.

The shadows in the valley from which I attempt to hide, do little more than expose how I truly feel inside

Beyond the “green pastures”, at the place where the water is still

I come face to face with the consequences of my own undaunted “free will.”

Righteousness and rebellion, for so long the two were one, yet how does one “undo” the damage that’s been done?

Restore the hope that once existed: replace fear with freedom, comfort, and rest.  Allow me to sit calmly at the table and know I’ve done my best.©

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2 thoughts on “Giving Up On God….

  1. If your expectations or presumptions about the Almighty Thou are based on the literary portraits of the various biblical authors, tis no wonder you find this Infinite/Absolute Mental Power that is envisioned to have originated the cosmic world and first generation of our species a most unjust–even evil– deity.

    I would suggest that you checkout a book I have written on the subject and am providing for free to any who wish to read it. The book is written in PDF format, and can thus be read on your personal computer. My book is entitled BEYOND THE WORD: An Awakening, and may be downloaded from my website: http://www.beyondtheword.net. If you have broadband internet service, I would recommend the 25Mb version, for it has a generated table of contents (bookmarks) for easy navigation.

    1. Thank you so much for you response to my blog post. It seems as though you may understand exactly what it is I was/am trying to say. I have not yet had the opportunity to read your book, but I am looking forward to it. I would like to know more about what inspired you to write it. That it is free and in a downloadable form, lets me know that you are very passionate about the subject matter and really want to share your knowledge. That’s awesome! Can you imagine how much better the world would be if there were more people like you in it?

      Please feel free to read (and pass along to others) some of the other posts I have written. I hop to hear from you again soon.
      Gigi

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